I have never tried to think about the complexities of life. Of many, Marriage is one among it. Marriage is a complexity? What is this guy even saying? If I am not wrong, this is the question that popped in your mind, if you are married. All unmarried people hate the concept of being married. Take it from me, or countless other people whom I came across. Marriage? Bleh! But it is not my place to point out anything about the aforementioned complexity, if I can call it.
It is beautiful, hands down. It is beautiful indeed to see a happy couple and their kids playing in the park, enjoying themselves and that is the what should we call it – perks of marriage. There is fun. May be I am not mature enough to speak about or lets just put it straight forwardly – I am an inexperienced to point out anything about it. But circumstances have compelled to me to put an eye on it and think about it. And being an super-analyst that I am, or preferably a critic , before I realize what I want to think, I have already started thinking about it.
What is it made of ? The mutual understanding ? The element of love ? What about love at first sight?(which don’t turn out into marriages). Can there be true love at all ? And what about true love in marriage ? What is it all about ?
Is it an agreement of understanding(?) or a life long agreement to stay besides one another trying to love (compulsion may be or not) each other. Compromise ? What does the heart have to say anything to about it at all? I don’t have any answers, just too many questions. But the mind is a decisive place where it draws conclusions for almost everything. So, I am also on the same page as it is. Or lets just say I am brainstorming. I know there are a lot of people who would be able to come up with an apt answer and a logical solution to all the questions.
A month ago my cousin sister got married. And we ( mostly its’ me) used to tease her because she kept telling that she didn’t want to get married so soon. But for girls the time runs faster and the earlier they are married, the better, I mean after the appropriate age, of course. She had been working for over 2 years and her parents thought that it was good to get her married than to wait. And also finding a suitable groom is another headache. Oh, believe me it is hell. There are so many factors that they have to consider. If only she had some sort of love story of hers, it would have narrowed it down. But there was no such thing. Can I call her a well grown Indian lady? Apart from all this, she was still married. When I asked her whether she liked the groom or not before, she put it very bluntly like it was her parent’s choice. Well yeah, of course it is. But her role also plays an important role, does it not? And yes, she liked the groom. Else she wouldn’t have accepted in the first place. But accepting that to me would just make her more vulnerable as I don’t back down a bit in teasing. And being shy is a virtue of girls, I guess. Okay, I had no idea what I just said. The thing is that she was also on the same page as their parents in respect to the groom but you just can’t tell the same, if you know what I mean. I asked her opinion on marriage and she explained a few words and may be I can put it something like this. It is more of an obligation, a responsibility of a being an adult woman and that as it was the right time, it is inevitable. Even if it were to be avoided, it couldn’t be. It’s complicated, I guess.
So here I go inferring more above my own thinking capability. What is the role of love in marriage? It is very rare that that one would fall in love at first sight. I don’t know about all that. But lets assume that when the boy visits the girls home for the first time, if it is love at first sight, then its’ just great, isn’t it? Before I move any further, Love is an important part of marriage, right? It might happen the first time or with time. But it will happen, if I am not wrong?Let me just go the all famous Disney stories. The girl, queen or a normal person falls in love with a charming prince or a prince-turned-into-beastly-creature, or whatever may be the places of people, the ending is just one line : And they lived happily ever after. Those are just great. All these never move ahead of that particular part. No one can put a finger and say that Yes, they lived happily ever after. Future is not predictable. No one can predict it, unless it is some sort of Disney story because it is always the good over evil and always ends with someone living happily ever after. Like I said, we just can’t be sure, what happens tomorrow. And about Marriages, well the same rules applies. But above all, there is always a higher probability of controlling the future in a way or the other. Isn’t that marriage is all about? Understanding, adjusting, advising, complimenting, supporting, loving, caring, whatnot (I agree there are a lot many other thing, may be you could help me fill it up).
I have never been in love. I have never even got close to it. I am pretty much kept myself out of that that institution. Not that it was my choice but it never happened and I can’t say anything about why or why not! So, when I hear people about their love stories (from people younger to me, all the teenage love), I am like What the hell? I am ignorant to anything that happens in the phenomenon. I don’t know why but I have closed myself completely to it. Or may be I am open to it, but opportunities didn’t present itself to me yet. Or else, Like I mentioned in one of my ‘what-the-hell-was-that’ post that when I don’t love myself, how can I expect others to love me. So, when I get the question about marriage, I think I will give a pass to it. No, seriously. It is clearly not my cup of tea. I don’t know how others are able to pull it off, but I, can’t even come close to those people.
To all the married people,
You are just awesome people. I just hope that you stay in love forever and cherish each moment to the end of the time. Stay Blessed.
And to all the people telling me that I am next. Be careful. I am not as good as I look. I can be worse, I guess. But no need to test it.
P.S. Just another post falling under the theme ‘Random’.
0 responses to “Marriage.”
Marriage is a Bliss if you both are apt for each other or atleast try being 🙂
Marriage is a Bliss if you both are apt for each other or atleast try being 🙂
Yes, you are right.
Thanks for dropping by. 🙂
Yes, you are right.
Thanks for dropping by. 🙂
I can give a sermon on this one but I am not gonna. Because it's something that you gotta experience. All I can say is a few words- What is the role of love in marriage, you ask? It is everything, I say. Right from the morning when you wake up to do all the work even though you are dead tired to the night when you give your loved ones that long foot massage even though your eyes droop. I cannot speak of arranged or love marriage but this is love in marriage. It encompasses just about everything and then something more.
Yes, it is a complexity of life. Accepting that is what will give you the strength to support your love throughout your life. Marriage for me is something that turned my life over to a new leaf. Even before marriage, I liked the idea of it because I was already in love. It's nothing like I imagined, it's totally different from what we think. You can only experience when the time comes. And until then my friend, enjoy 🙂
Until later,
Keirthana 🙂
P.S: This is a girl's perspective. Not sure what a guy's view would be 😛
I can give a sermon on this one but I am not gonna. Because it's something that you gotta experience. All I can say is a few words- What is the role of love in marriage, you ask? It is everything, I say. Right from the morning when you wake up to do all the work even though you are dead tired to the night when you give your loved ones that long foot massage even though your eyes droop. I cannot speak of arranged or love marriage but this is love in marriage. It encompasses just about everything and then something more.
Yes, it is a complexity of life. Accepting that is what will give you the strength to support your love throughout your life. Marriage for me is something that turned my life over to a new leaf. Even before marriage, I liked the idea of it because I was already in love. It's nothing like I imagined, it's totally different from what we think. You can only experience when the time comes. And until then my friend, enjoy 🙂
Until later,
Keirthana 🙂
P.S: This is a girl's perspective. Not sure what a guy's view would be 😛
So, the only way to find out is by getting married. No other way?
P.S. May be Mr. Keirthana could help me out with that then. 😛
So, the only way to find out is by getting married. No other way?
P.S. May be Mr. Keirthana could help me out with that then. 😛
If marriage for women is inevitable why is not also inevitable for men… are there many more men then women where you are from? I have been proposed to several times in my life (I mean dozens of times) and have refused every single time, when I look back I realise life, for me, was much better without marriage. I am now with a man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. He tells me it is impossible to love him as much as he loves me. I think there are many reasons people marry – apart from saving money on taxes and insurance I don't really see the point. Continue to ask questions it's the only way to come up with answers… You have however answered the most important one of all – If you don't start by loving yourself you will never experience love fully.
Ida
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If marriage for women is inevitable why is not also inevitable for men… are there many more men then women where you are from? I have been proposed to several times in my life (I mean dozens of times) and have refused every single time, when I look back I realise life, for me, was much better without marriage. I am now with a man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. He tells me it is impossible to love him as much as he loves me. I think there are many reasons people marry – apart from saving money on taxes and insurance I don't really see the point. Continue to ask questions it's the only way to come up with answers… You have however answered the most important one of all – If you don't start by loving yourself you will never experience love fully.
Ida
Reflex Reactions